tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584717932614331214.post212416661219703548..comments2023-11-05T02:56:27.598-06:00Comments on A Mindful Bride: What does it mean to be a "wife"?Dyannehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10641830777721948390noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584717932614331214.post-81534669396917954652009-03-24T14:22:00.000-05:002009-03-24T14:22:00.000-05:00Thank you for making me laugh and being so open an...Thank you for making me laugh and being so open and understanding, fiance. I love you too!Dyannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12383152078380104490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584717932614331214.post-74353447384878748572009-03-24T13:43:00.000-05:002009-03-24T13:43:00.000-05:00A very interesting comment indeed. While changing...A very interesting comment indeed. While changing your name has symbolic value, and practical implications down the line, I can see that it also could strip away a feeling of comfort, continuity, and identity. <BR/><BR/> In all growth, there is a spectrum from Ease to Stretch to Stress. We cannot grow in ease, but if we push to hard we injure ourselves - mentally, emotionally, and physically. We need to listen to our minds, our emotions, our bodies and challenge ourselves to stretch without pushing too far and risking injury. <BR/><BR/>I think that is the problem with seeing marriage as a binary change - today I am fiance, tomorrow I am wife/husband. This is like saying today I am couch potato, tomorrow marathon runner. I think marriage is a challenging process of growth, and our commitment is not to the result - to being a good wife or husband - but to process of growing in ourselves and our relationship. <BR/><BR/><BR/>As to the fraught terminology of "wife", I would suggest the following as possible alternatives:<BR/><BR/>- Friend<BR/>- Companion<BR/>- Partner<BR/>- Lover<BR/>- Co-Chair of the Love Committee <BR/>- She-Who-Must-Be-Obeyed (you might need to google this one)<BR/><BR/><BR/>love, Fiance<BR/><BR/>p.s. Your blog is making me type in "Warch" before I can post a comment. What kind of word is Warch? Sounds Scottish ("I'm going to warch the tele").RDHhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15880403249808046040noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584717932614331214.post-33007327715374898912009-03-13T09:55:00.000-05:002009-03-13T09:55:00.000-05:00That's an interesting response, especially since I...That's an interesting response, especially since I am planning to change my name. Although it's something I go back and forth about. Something to think about. Good thing I will have plenty of time to make up my mind on that one :)Dyannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12383152078380104490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-584717932614331214.post-42992983697256148482009-03-12T17:44:00.000-05:002009-03-12T17:44:00.000-05:00I've been struggling with this one. I have so man...I've been struggling with this one. I have so many images in my head of what it means to be a 'wife', and none of them are especially pleasing. Unfortunately, they mostly relate to staying at home and taking care of the house and kids full time, neither of which I plan to do. Interesting how all these identity issues come out... one married friend told me, if you're having identity issues now, don't change your name when you get married.elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10887625097831786188noreply@blogger.com