Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Wedding Ceremony

Image from

Because we are getting married in the Catholic Church, we don't get the freedom to come up with our own vows or wedding traditions. I am a little jealous when I see people come up with such meaningful new traditions, like Sara and Matt did (love their wedding quilt--pictured--made from pieces of fabric donated by friends and family). We are stuck with a pretty traditional service--we got a little book with our choices of readings. And we are not necessarily excited with our options. I think we can pick some other bible readings, so if you have any suggestions for something you found that isn't in the Catholic church's booklet, please let me know. On the plus side, it is one aspect of the wedding that is pretty much set (as in, I don't feel any pressure to come up with creative ways to express our love for each other, because, really, I don't think I could do it--how do you meaningfully articulate that feeling and commitment you are undertaking?)

I also don't think we have much freedom to write our own vows. I asked my fiance about it and his opinion was that he was okay with traditional vows. I am too. While we could draft something more personal, I don't think that you can really improve upon the sentiment in traditional vows--for better and for worse, in sickness, and in health--pretty much sums up the commitment we are making to each other. Faith explainedit well here: she and her fiance chose to "stick with the short simple, and old-fashioned words in our ceremony. We wanted to be connected to the longstanding supports of tradition, community, and strength we have available in our personal faiths." I agree. As an alternative, I was thinking that perhaps we could toast each other at the reception as a way to share our more personal feelings about each other and our marriage. Has anyone been to a wedding where a bride and groom have done that? Do you think it would be too much talking (and not enough eating and dancing) when combined with the other toasts?


Kelley at My Island Wedding said...

Hey, why don't you check with the priest in your parish to see if they will allow a "wedding mat" at your ceremony.

I married my husband (Catholic), but I am Protestant, and we weren't allowed to get married at the altar, but he did allow us to bring in a hand painted "mat" from my sister..., we stood at it and we were able to "take home" the spot where we were married! (Block Island, RI). My hubby was from Long Island NY and I was living in CT at the time. What a great mommento... and it could bring some personalization you are looking for????

Best of luck.

a mindful bride said...

Kelley, I have never heard of such a thing. What a wonderful memento. I will have to see what the story is at our Church (since my soon-to-to-husband isn't Catholic). Thanks for sharing.