Wedding Photos

Greetings all -

We are still honeymooning. Here is our (AWESOME) photographers' blog post with our wedding photos, that I thought I'd share. I'll do more recaps when we return.

Cheers!

I'm married...

Sorry for seriously disappearing this month before the wedding. It happened. It was AMAZING--I am not someone who expected or needed my wedding to be the best day of my life so far. But it was. It was perfect. We are jetting off on our honeymoon tomorrow, but I'll post more details when we return the end of September.

Cheers!

Practice Flowers

This weekend my mom and I did a couple practice runs with flowers. Here's our practice bouquet.

And bout

I think they turned out pretty well and that we can pull off our DIY flowers.

On Budgets

There was a flurry of discussion a while ago about wedding budgets. I didn't chime in, but I am going to now. What I say may not be popular, but that isn't what this whole process is about -- it's about being you and being honest about that. Honestly, our wedding budget is way way higher than we intended it to be. Well, that's not entirely true. At a certain point we made a decision to have a wedding that cost more or less what we are spending. I actually didn't really want to know what it was costing--we've paid so much as we go (deposits, invitations, dress) that I sort of lost track and wasn't too upset about that. At this point we can't really change much, so what's the point. Sweetie, thinking the picture was better than it is put together a spreadsheet and now we know. It's a big number. Even though we are buying our own alcohol and doing our own flowers. It's a number that we could have done a lot of other things with. Do I regret it? No. Planning a wedding has meant a lot of things to me and for us as a couple. We have learned a lot about ourselves and our families; some good, some not so good. And while planning a wedding hasn't always been "fun" we have grown so much during this process. We have started to figure out who we are as a couple and how we as a couple relate to our friends and our families. We've seen how to press our families buttons (and, hopefully, we can translate this knowledge in the future into how not to press their buttons). I have learned a lot about myself and my fiance. And, I have to say what I have learned only makes me love him more. He is so loving and kind and supportive. He may be a pushover about somethings, but when people are hurting me, he is my champion. What a wonderful feeling. I trust him more now that we've gone through this. We feel more comfortable with each others strengths and weaknesses. My fiance will never be perfect and shame on me if I ever expect him to be; he wouldn't be very lovable if he were. I know that a party may not be worth what we are spending, but I certainly think that a solid marriage is. Could we have accomplished what we have and spent much less, absolutely! Each of our situations is different, and my sanity was certainly worth some portion of what we are spending. I am truly envious of all you brides who have thrifted and crafted and created a beautiful meaningful wedding at a fraction of the cost of ours. You have accomplished something really wonderful that I haven't. And I admire you for that. But this is our wedding and we have done the best that we can. And this experience, this opportunity for growth, is priceless. So, I will not feel bad about the cost--I will celebrate what this journey has brought us (even if its pretty darn expensive!). Cheers!

Shoes

So, I am trying to pick shoes. If you'll recall, my bridesmaids are wearing aqua, lavender, light blue, and pink. They are wearing these shoes, to help keep their look coherent. I also have a pair like this, that I could wear to match, but I think I'd prefer something more colorful.

Here are a few options I've come up with, what do you think?

* sorry I don't have photo credits

I am now afraid of my to-do list...

With only 53 days left to go until the wedding and still needing to finish my job, find an apartment, pack, and move between now and then in addition to all the remaining wedding tasks, I am feeling overwhelmed!! I know it will all get done, but these days I am afraid to look at my to-do list because I know that there are so many things that need to get done like NOW! The likelihood of out-of-town bags and favors diminishes every day...



On a totally different subject, I apologize for the lack of pictures lately. For whatever reason, I have gotten out of the habit of taking photos myself (I sealed up our second to last invitation and totally forgot to take a picture of the liner to post!) and although I still enjoy looking at pretty wedding photos, they no longer provide the inspiration for me that they once did. Now, I see something pretty but I know its not what we are going to do, so I think "oh that's lovely" and quickly move on. So, that's why you haven't many photos around lately. I am trying to work on it because I know they make my blog oh so much prettier for your viewing pleasure!

I will be married soon...

I took Friday off to attend a wedding in Newport Beach, California with my fiance. It was awesome--I think I really needed a mini-vacation. My my fiance's dad's cousin's grandson (not sure what that technical relationship is called) was getting married and my fiance was a groomsman. It was really neat to meet some future (attenuated) relatives. For some reason it gave me some much needed perspective about why I am really looking forward to being married. Sometimes our wedding feels like the capstone to my youth. That once we are married we have to start being "grown up" and that it will symbolize the end of some things in my life that I have really cherished (independence!) and we will now start to get "old." Which is true to some extent. But at this wedding for some reason I really felt how excited I am to have my own family with my fiance and our (hopefully) future children. I am also really looking forward to getting a whole new family to learn about, love, and with whom to share our joys and sorrows. Although I will never have another wedding, I am looking forward to all the new experiences marriage will bring. Including, hopefully, the wedding of our children and grandchildren. So, right now I am more excited about the adventure that will be our life together and less sad about my single life that I am leaving behind. I feel nearly, almost ready to be married. (And just in time, I think we have about 54 days left!).

My dress is "here"!

The bridal shop just called to say they have my dress and to confirm shipping information--unfortunately I missed them! Hopefully my dress can get to Chicago by next weekend, so I can have my first fitting when I am up there for our couple's shower and tasting. Yay! This is so exciting. I am really glad it came early, so that I can (hopefully) arrange to have my first fitting the end of July instead of the middle of August.

oh, darling!

Did you know that Whitney, of Darling Dexter, and her husband Dustin have started taking wedding photos?! Head over to oh, darling! photography to check them out!.

Their prices are sooooooooo reasonable. I would book them soon before they go up, becuase you know they will when they take beautiful images like these.

And from Whitney's blog they seem like just the creative and laid-back people that you'd want at your wedding (or at least that I'd want at my wedding!).

* all images from oh, darling! photography

Invitations.... (mostly) GONE!

So, they are gone. The lady at the post office let me hand cancel them with their stamp, which only took about ten minutes to do 90. (Let's face it, I didn't really care, but after all the work we did, for ten minutes of time it seems worth it even if only a couple people notice.)

Wheee!! I know for some sending out the invitations has triggered anxiety about the wedding, but I feel GREAT (maybe because one big task on the to do list has been (mostly) crossed off??).

Good luck to everyone who is working on their invitations!! It was one of my favorite projects so far, I think because you get to see the finished product more immediately (as in you don't have to wait until "the day" to see the fruits of your effort--can we say instant gratification??). And I think for us, we found the perfect combination of DIY and purchased items to have a beautiful invitation that we also put some effort and heart into getting just right.

More Invitations...

Has anyone else found invitations to be the project that just won't end?? Well ours were supposed to go into the mail the end of last week and I am going to put them in the mail today (will the Post Office hand stamp them for me? We shall see.) But we still have a couple trailing addresses and about ten or fifteen more that need to be addressed and stuffed... Sigh, soon enough.

So, as I posted before, we purchased our invitations from Bella Figura and had a really wonderful experience with them. We then picked out coordinating envelopes and envelope liners from Paper Source. Of course, we picked paper that didn't come pre-cut so my honey cut out 125 envelope liners, but we really think it was worth it. I "hand addressed" them all by tracing over a the address we printed directly onto the invitation--which worked out really well. And, finally, we ordered the Fling return address stamp from PaperWink.

PaperWink was really great to work with (although the stamp's arrival was delayed due to a mix-up at my apartment). But last night I was able to stamp all the back flaps with my parents' address, as shown here:

And today they will go in the mail--Yay!!

UPDATE on this weekend

So, my sister has appendicitis and they are transferring her to a different hospital for surgery soon. Please say a little prayer that everything goes well. We have already cancelled some of the festivities for tomorrow and I just hope that she is feeling well enough to enjoy some of my shower on Sunday. I feel so bad after she worked so hard planning everything! But I suppose we will find a way to make the best of it.

I have to admit that I am bummed that things won't go as planned this weekend (and feeling selfish for feeling sorry for myself when my sister is in the hospital in pain and going to have to have surgery). But maybe it's good practice for the wedding--you just have to go with it and trust that it will work out. (And, as the doctor said, at least it's not my WEDDING that's tomorrow!)

Weekend Wedding Festivities

I am off this weekend for my bachelorette party and shower, all planned in secret by my sisters (MOHs). I have no idea what's in store for me--other than it requires a white dress and a dress appropriate for tea. White not being my favorite color, finding a white dress was a challenge. I purchased no less than 4 white dresses in the attempt to find the right one for... I don't even know what. But it should be a wonderful time. I'll get to catch up with my Mom and sisters. And spend some time with some time with my future MIL and SIL without my fiance. Hopefully I'll have some not to scandalous pictures to post when I return.

Wedding Reception Activities

During our wedding reception, we are going to have several activities--croquet and bocce ball outside on the lawn. We are also going to have a video guest book inside.

Recently, we thought about doing an auction/ raffle as well. But I've been reading up on it online and the general consenus seems to be that it would be tacky. Our idea was to sell raffle tickets that to benefit a charity. Then having a selection of items that people can try to win that have significance to us: so, for example, our guide book from Hawaii with book marks of what we did and funny stories from our trip, the box from the bottle of champagne that honey gave me that I saved for almost a year (it even moved with me) before we drank it the night we got engaged and a bottle of champange, a framed engagement photo of us. Each will have a jar where people can put their raffle tickets for a chance to win the item. The idea is to have something inexpensive, but symbolic, along with a little story about us. Hence, it would more about getting people involved in a fun way to read about our relationship, then about making money or winning a cool prize.

Tacky? Or creative and fun?

Remember to Breathe

We had a wonderful long weekend and got most of our invitations done--envelopes addressed and lined and stuffed!! I haven't taken any pictures yet, so I'll have to update tomorrow. We are still waiting on our return address stamp that we ordered from Paperwink to get them out the door, but it should arrive this weekend, so we are looking good :)

Also, I wanted to send along this link with the reminder that breathing is a great way to help you get centered and deal with stress and feeling overwhelmed. It is so easy to feel overwhelmed in the midst of wedding planning--with sometimes towering to do lists, dealing with families who don't "get" your wedding planning, and the fact that soon you will be a "wife"--but simply breathing can help keep you grounded, centered, and calm.

Holiday Weekend

I am counting down the minutes... 120 minutes... until the holiday long weekend begins and... 170 minutes... until I can pick up my sweetie up at the aiport... The clock is going VERY slowly today...

Self-Addressed Envelopes

So, I did a test run yesterday on DIY "calligraphying" my envelopes according to Jenn at With This Ring's tutorial. I chose the English font that I found at dafont. The font is a little boring, so I experimented with adding my own embellishments. I am a little afraid that it will look too perfect--since I am tracing over computer printed words. I also found using a calligraphy pen was much easier for me than a calligraphy marker. I couldn't figure out how to get the marker to make clean lines. One of the biggest problems I had was getting my printer to feed my envelopes (that's why the picture is off-center). Has anyone figured out a solution to this? The fiance is going to try with his home computer, so hopefully that will work. Does anyone have any other tips for this method of addressing?

To Do Lists

I have been working with my own to do list that I made based on a Real Simple Wedding list and a book we purchased (and I have avoided the Knot's list with one-million to dos like the plague). We are behind!! But, I was reviewing our list and realized there were a lot of things scheduled to do by July 1st, that I'm not planning to do until August. Because I am leaving my current job mid-August and won't be starting a new one until after the wedding, I will have almost a month to get settled and do some projects. Things I was planning to do: programs, favors (unless they get scratched), other signage, welcome baskets. I noticed that my list has me scheduled to be done with everything by August 12 (one month pre-wedding). While I know that's ideal, I think for me it makes time to use that time to do projects since I won't be working. Any thoughts? I'd love to know if you think I'm crazy for planning to do so much in the last month? I think it might actually be nice to have something to keep me busy and keep my anxiety down.

Catering Confusion

We met with a potential caterer for over an hour yesterday and all she talked to us about was color scheme and how the linens and tables and flowers would be used. Helpful, but I think we thought our caterer would be more concerned about the food. Has anyone had this experience? What did you think--is it a great value added that your caterer brought or did it mean that the food cannot speak for itself?

Musings on Marriage

As a mindful bride, I have spent a lot of time thinking about (and worrying about) my upcoming marriage. Will we be happily married? How do we make sure that we have a loving supportive marriage? I really like reading the Simple Marriage website because it offers such interesting insights on how to have a good marriage.

What resources have you found helpful when contemplating your upcoming marriage?

Wear Life Loosely

"The Law of Detachment says that in order to acquire anything in the physical universe, you have to relinquish your attachment to it." - Deepak Chopra, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success

"If we simply saw life as a loose garment, something we drape around ourselves but are not firmly attached to, we would find it easier to live. I feel more comfortable living this way, as if life were something I could slip out of at any moment. It seems to help me focus on the important things instead of the details that mean little." - Dr. Bernie S. Siegel, 365 Prescriptions for the Soul

My yoga instructor read this to us at the beginning of class last week and I immediately thought of its relevance to wedding planning. It is so easy to become so attached to every detail that we forget to focus on the important things. Thinking of my wedding as a loose fitting garment instead of the definition of our life or future marriage helps decrease my anxiety that it won't perfectly reflect who we are. Instead, we just need to focus on the important aspects and remember that the rest is just the garment that we dress the day, the occassion in.

Bridesmaids' Gift?

Wouldn't this clutch make a great bridesmaids' gift?

Available here via Erin Ever After

And coordinate with bridesmaids' dresses in these colors?

Taking a Break from the Usually Scheduled Wedding Blogging to Bring You a Message from..

Planet Earth

Did you know that there is a giant vortex of waste (mostly plastic) floating in the Pacific Ocean between Hawaii and San Francisco? It is estimated that it is larger than the state of Texas and may even be larger than the United States!! Because plastic isn't biodegradeable, every piece of plastic that has ended up in the ocean is still there. As a result of currents, the plastic that doesn't sink has collected in this area in the Pacific Ocean. Over time it breaks up into smaller pieces that marine life mistakes for food. It ends up killing many of these animals and also gets into the food chain. And this plastic continent is growing everyday.

The good news, it looks like Project Kaisei is doing something about it! But we could all do more by being more mindful about what we buy and remembering to take reusable bags with us to the store.

For more information about this growing threat to our planet, you can go here, and here or just search plastic vortex pacific ocean in Google.

Quandry*

Gah! I am totally lusting after One Barefoot Bride's totally awesome birdcage veil and fascinator from Kasia Fink. Isn't it gorgeous?!

by One Barefoot Bride

But I really really want a picture of a blowing veil like the one below.

by Meg Smith via Snippet & Ink

So, what's a girl to do?

* Blog post title inspired by Mouse

What's it all for?

For love...

"My love for him is not of this world. It can't be broken by anything, not by and worldly ideas of what love is. Not by death. Nothing. Love is Godly, God is love. And we are his children. Our bond will carry us to the eternities and beyond. It's not cheesy, it's truth."
- Stephanie from the NieNie Dialogues

Non-Matching Bridesmaids

j crew, aaron delesie, the image is found, sugarlove weddings via green wedding shoes via bespoke press

So excited to read the post on Green Wedding Shoes today about non-matching bridesmaid dresses. I have been a bit concerned about going this route, but am feeling much better about my decision now :)

UPDATE: Check out Erin Ever After's post today for more pictures of non-matching bridesmaids!

An Ode to my Followers

Thanks for stopping by
to see and read and comment
you make me gleeful!

Flower Trial

After her initial hesitation, my Mom has jumped on board with our plan to DIY flowers. She is even taking a flower class at the local community college. She sent me this picture over the weekend--that greenery, it's from the shrub outside. And the roses are from my parents' garden. Anyway, this isn't exactly what we are going for, but a good trial, I think, using what she had around.

I apologize for the lack of posting--trying to stay away from wedding blogs in an effort to focus on work really cuts down the inspiration for posts. But, we have been making slow but steady progress on our to do list: we finally approved the proof for our invitations and should be getting them in a couple weeks, I am going to order bridesmaid dresses this week (woo hoo for 20% off coupon from JCrew), and I think I have found hair and make-up people, among other things we have been up to...

Weird Love

Via Erin Ever After via Rockstar Diaries

You've likely seen this before, but it's worth re-posting. Happy Monday!

Black Pencil Skirt

Do you have one item of clothing that you adore above all others? I do. My black pencil skirt. I almost didn't buy it because it didn't have a matching jacket. But, even so, I wear it every week (and sometimes, when I am feeling lazy twice a week, don't tell). I love it--it's flattering, it goes with everything, you can dress it up or down. All it needs is a great pair of shoes. So, what's your favorite item of clothing (other than your wedding dress, of course)?

Bridesmaid Dresses

If my bridesmaids like these, I may end up doing bridesmaid dresses in these colors and giving the ladies a choice between two styles. What do you think? Look too bridesmaid-y? Too pastel-y?

Hydrangeas

Photos by Harry Taylor via Mint

For a while now my mother has decided that the one thing she really cares about at my wedding is blue hydrangeas. I have been unenthusiastic. Not because I don't like hydrangeas, but because I think they can seem a little stiff and boring. But Ellie's arragnements with hydrangeas from her recent wedding are awesome! I really love the way they were combined with other more colorful flowers. So, we'll see. Maybe my Mom will get her hydrangeas after all..

Rings and Things

So, I have a ring dilemma. My engagement ring is curved toward the bottom, so a straight ring won't fit up next to it, unless it is curved to fit my engagement ring. If it is curved to fit my engagement ring, it will look funny to wear without my engagement ring. And, I am planning on leaving my engagement ring behind when we go travel around the world. So, I am contemplating buying two rings--one fitted and just a simple band for traveling. My fiance isn't thrilled about this idea. But I really can't think of another solution. Any thoughts?

I wonder if this band would work with my engagement ring, but even if it did, it isn't quite as plain as I wanted for traveling around the world.

I'm baaaaaaaack...

Whew! That was a wonderful whirlwind weekend/ week. The best part was showing my Mom our venues on Wednesday. It was actually the first time I had seen our hotel, Church, and reception venue all at once and it was very exciting. I can actually finally see things coming together and the details all seemed really manageable, in part, because our venues don't require much in the way of decorations.

We also went to go hear our band play on Sunday night. It was a small crowd, so we got a chance to hang out with them during their break. They are going to be great! And I am really glad we got a chance to get to know each other a little better before they perform at our wedding.

It seems like our last big decision is... catering! Less than four months out and we still don't have a caterer, but we are working with a couple people to come up with quotes, so I think that will be resolved soon.

Farmer's Market Breakfast

I love Farmer's Markets!! I think maybe it's that you are actually buying your food from the people who put their energy, heart, and soul into growing it. So, I am really excited that our Farmer's Market is open and I can get fresh fruit and veggies and other yummy things. This breakfast from Saturday shows off my fresh whole wheat honey bread with sunflower seeds and strawberries--unfortunately, we missed the eggs so these are just what I had from Whole Foods. I hope you are enjoying fresh fruit and vegetables, too!

Wow... time flies

No updates today--I have been rather, er... distracted at work lately, so to get myself back on track I am swearing off looking at blogs at work. But I am ahead of schedule today (wow! not looking at blogs really gets me working), so I have about five more minutes to poke around. We are going to be doing LOTS'o'wedding stuff this weekend:

- Friday I fly to Chicago
- Saturday we are checking out Farmer's Markets to see about ordering our DIY Flowers, meeting with our priest, I have a make-up trial, we are going to look at rings and take a dance lesson
- Sunday we are meeting with the music director at the Church, checking out venues to get goodies for getting ready, Sunday "brunch," rehearsal dinner and welcome drinks, swinging by REI to check out packs for our RTW trip, and checking out our band
- Monday we are going sailing with the future in-laws and doing centerpiece trial runs
- Tuesday we have our tasting and our parents are meeting for the first time
- Wednesday my Mom and I are going to check out the Church, hotel, and reception venue (she hasn't seen them yet)
- Thursday morning I return to Memphis (early!)

Whew!! But it's been really nice to have this long weekend to get wedding stuff done. For the past couple months we have been adding to dos for the weekend and now we are pretty booked. Hopefully, it will be productive.

On Wedding Dress Shopping...

One of the best things to me about blogging is the opportunity to get support from so many women and to get a glimpse into their own struggles and triumphs in wedding planning. I have finally realized that those aspects of wedding planning that trip me up the most are the same things that trouble me in my daily life, just magnified many times. Yes, one of these is choosing what to wear. I am not terribly stylish or hip, but I do care about looking nice and like "me." Some days this means more than one tried and rejected outfit lands on my bed or floor before I head out the door for the day. When choosing what to wear on a normal every day outting can cause this much angst, no wonder choosing what to wear on my wedding day has caused even more. And after realizing my deep-seated fear of committing to a wedding dress was part of the delay I got worried that this signaled a deep repressed fear of committing to marry my dear sweet honey. Yes, I am scared (terrified even) of getting married and of being married. But I realized it was less about my fiance and more about the huge momentous event this was in my life. I do not believe that it will be or should be the best day of my life, but on this day before God, our society, and my community I will be transformed from a single woman into a wife and a life partner. This people, is a very big deal. So, no wonder, after searching high and low, I have not yet spied the perfect garment to wear on this day--I believe that, for me, there simply isn't a dress that could match this momentous occassion. After all that, here's a link to see a sneak peek at what I have chosen.

Invitations: Ordered!!!

Printemps Invitation by Bella Figura

As promised, this is my next invitation post and I am writing to say that we (finally) picked out and ordered our invitations. Yay!! I am really very excited about this decision. I have to admit, that I fell in love with the Bella Figura invitations when I first checked them out. But, they were out of our price range, so I searched and searched for what I wanted instead. I sent my dear sweet patient fiance chasing links to many many invitations. The conversations would go like this:

Me: "What do you think of this?"

Him: "I like it."

The next day....

Me: "Hmmm... I don't love it."

And the search went on. I cannot even tell you how many invitations I have looked at, all I know is that it was WAY too many. A few weekends ago when I was in Chicago we visited Paper Source (there isn't one here) and picked this design. The positive--we could get our invitation letterpressed and the reply card flat printed, saving us money. Pricing it out, it came out to more than we had originally budgeted, but at that point we were willing to pay that price to cross one more item off of our list. And I was satisfied. But not excited. I was happy to have one more thing checked off the list. But I wasn't looking forward to having them arrive in the mail and looking at their prettiness.

We had already decided that we didn't need any enclosures except a reply card, because all the details are on our website and all the enclosures increase the price in muliples, plus it wastes paper. We are hoping that our guests will RSVP online, which left us wondering what to do with our reply cards--do we address and stamp them all knowing that only a few will get returned because most of our friends and family are pretty tech savvy (my grandfather RSVP'd once he received our Save the Date). So, fiance suggested including RSVP information... on the invitation. Gasp! Really?! More paper saved. More money saved. So, I looked--what is the price of a Bella Figura oh-so-pretty letterpressed invitation if all we ordered was the invitation? Slightly cheaper than our Paper Source option. And, Bella Figura's etiquette page has this to say about adding reply information to your invitation:

We've seen this idea become more popular as clients approach letterpress wedding invitations with both budget and the environment in mind. Printing your reply information in the bottom left hand corner of your invitation is an acceptable alternative that can save you money. Reply cards are a relatively modern invention, so by placing reply information on the invitation itself, you are still being traditional.

Sold! Oh, and they are eco-friendly, which also makes us feel like the invitation reflects our values as a couple. The invitation we ended up picking (pictured above) is more traditional and romantic than the designs we had previously entertained. But, I like it and fiance likes it. And I am excited to see them arrive at my door. So, today we ordered our invitations!!!

Thank you for your support as I have struggled with this decision. Now, I just need to figure out what DIY tasks I will take on to get these in the mail: envelope liners? calligraphy?

My fiance spoils me

I just got back from lunch and these beauties (courtesy of the fiance) were waiting for me. Beautiful. I am so lucky to have such a sweet and thoughtful future husband :)

Gah! I bought my dress

I bought my dress this afternoon after four hours in the biggest bridal shop that I have ever seen and I have already fallen out of love with it and back in love with it in the five hours since! Did you have bridal dress buyer's remorse? Is this normal?

Invitation Redux

We still have not ordered our invitations. Why? Because I am indecisive and we'll make a decision and the next morning I wake up less than enthusiastic about it. I know, its just a piece of paper people will throw away. But, I want it to be pretty. We already decided that we don't need a reception card--we are just going to put "reception to follow" on the invitation. Information and directions are on our website and we'll probably also add directions from the Church to the reception location in the program for good measure. Last night I think we decided to skip the response card as well and just advise people to "kindly reply" online at our website. This will save us money and allow us to get the very pretty invitations I have wanted all along. And it's good for the environment becuase we are using less paper that will just be discarded. Thoughts? Is the concept of sending invitations with no (zip, zero, zilch) enclosures insane?! Have we lost our mind?

P.S. I promise that my next invitation post will be titled "Invitations: Ordered!" (because otherwise I think I may have a very grouchy fiance on my hands--even his patience must wear thin at some point)

Nifty Wedding Gift

Oooh - just saw this on Green Wedding Shoes. What a great wedding gift these would make. I like this serving bowl (and the dessert sets are pretty neat, too!)

* Photo from Jessica Rust Designs

Bridesmaid Dress

Still trying to decide on Bridesmaid dresses.

This should be good for a laugh

Or maybe I'm the only one who finds it funny. The fiance started a wiki for us (using PBwiki) to organize our world travel plans and ideas. We also started using it to organize our wedding to do list (does this make us REALLY BIG nerds?). It has worked really well to divide wedding task responsibility and maintain communication over the distance. Plus we see what the other has done and it keeps us motivated. So, I sent my sweetie an e-mail with some of the thoughts in my post yesterday. For some reason, despite reading this sentiment again and again, it finally sunk in: we need to stop obsessing about this being our "wedding." We just needed to let that go and plan a party--except with a lot more guests and a big poofy white dress (okay, maybe not big and poofy). This thought was like an epiphany to me. I have been trying to figure out how to do "weddingy" stuff, but in our own unique way. Whatever that means!! It is so much easier to just drop the pressure, stress, and associations that come when you use the word "wedding" (even when you are just talking to yourself). Anyway, the fiance was totally on board with this and even added a "mission statement" to our wiki page with our wedding to do list. He made up this slogan for us: "Ask yourself WWWRND ("What Would We Really Normally Do?")." And that folks, I think is good for a laugh! (Or maybe you are just laughing because we use a wiki to track our wedding to do list).

Love and Weddings

I apologize for my lack of posting lately. It is a direct result of trying to be more focused at work and spending less time reading blogs, finding inspiration, and posting about my thoughts. My evenings have also been more busy because I am trying to get into some kind of work out routine. It's also because we haven't made very many wedding decisions lately--we picked out our invitations (the ones via Paper Source I discussed below), but still no dress or bridesmaid dresses. And, it's also because, in light of my friends' sad tragedy, it has been difficult to get excited about the superficial details. Let's face it, I haven't been much into the details to begin with (see, e.g., the steak knives) and now they just seem to pale in comparison to the really important stuff--love, family, and friends. I feel indulgent and shallow spending time and energy on what is, at the end of the day, a party for me (and my beloved). Then I rationalize: a wedding is important (eloping has never been a serious option for us because (a) getting married in a Church is important to me, (b) community is an important part of a marriage--through marriage we assume a different status in our community and ask our community to support us on our marraige journey, and (c) celebrating life and love is a really good thing) and there are decisions that need to be made, even if they are superficial, because people need to eat and they need to drink and they need to have somewhere to sit or stand... and the list goes on. So, there we are. We are getting married. We are having a wedding. And we need to figure out the "stuff." Meg wrote a great post the other day on details. She said that if "we strive to create a wedding that reflects who we are and what we value, we will, without trying, create details that will form an indelible impression in our guests minds, details that will be a gift." Great!* But how do I figure out who we are and what we value? It just doesn't seem so simple. I cannot for the life of me figure out what "details" we have inadvertantly created. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. As a hostess I go WAY WAY overboard (I have admitted to being a perfectionist before, right?). And we simply cannot afford go overboard for our wedding (not enough time or money or energy). So, it is nearly impossible to reflect my (and our) method of entertaining--too much yummy homemade food and beverages--at our wedding. Or can we....

* And I really do mean great despite my subsequent whining. Meg's posts are insightful and honest and I totally agree with the sentiment and the concept, but just needed to voice my frustration in the context of my (our) individual journey to create a wedding that... feels good to us in spite of it being a giant money pit

Sweet Snacks

My wedding is less than five months away. Eek!! My to do list is huge! I am planning to head to Chicago over Memorial Day weekend and stay through Wednesday to get some wedding stuff done. We have schedule our tasting and will, hopefully, pick out a bakery to order our desserts from. Our plan is to NOT have a giant wedding cake, but a variety of cakes and other sweets. At one time I thought that I could make these (along with some assistance from family and friends) and while I haven't ruled that option out yet, I feel like there will be enough things to do as the wedding approaches. Especially because, ahem, I don't even have a dress yet!

* Photo from Alliance Bakery

Reasons why families are important...

My friends lost their dear sweet baby boy this weekend. Today, my thoughts and prayers are with them and their families. If you are reading this, please say a little prayer for them or just send some good thoughts their way.

Back to Wedding Thoughts

After spending a couple days contemplating this new decision/ opportunity, I am trying to re-focus on the wedding planning. The wedding is more imminent than any traveling we decide to do and desperately requires my attention (and me to make some decisions!). While in Chicago for Easter this past weekend I tried on a dress that I thought might be the one, but even on a second look it still wasn't "right," so we're back to the drawing board on that front.

We also visited Paper Source (my first time ever-gasp!, I know). I think we are going the Paper Source route and getting our invitations letterpressed and our response cards flat printed. This seemed like the most economical compromise for us and I really like how you can customize everything, but keep consistent shades and colors. We are deciding between two options:

This invitation (in dark blue, I forget the exact color name):

Colonial Stencil Invitation

Or just going with plain lettering (no design) and adding a stamp. Here are a couple that I found at Terbearco's shop on Etsy that could work:

Thinking on it...

From here

As it turns out, I will not be starting my new job in October or November, but in January or March... or next fall (with a paid stipend). So, what do I do? This decision seems so full of opportunity and possibility and it scares me. It's also frustrating because it delays our plan to get married and begin our new settled married life together. Today wedding planning is being shoved to the backburner and I am working and creating a wish list of things I would like to do with this time off. If you had the opportunity to make a small, but manageable salary (without going to work) for six months or a year, how would you use that time?

Yes, please!!

Image from here via A Cup of Jo

So, did I mention that we are planning to stop in the South of France on our honeymoon. And paddling in the Dordogne looks like it might be a must-do activity.

Seriously!?

photo by darwin bell via mint

I definitely want paper lanterns for our reception--hanging from the porch and maybe also from the trees; probably in white maybe in pale green. So, when I saw that Luna Bazaar is offering Mint readers 20% off, I figured I should head over there and complete my lantern purchase. I mean, I am desperate for things I can actually GET DONE. But then I realized that I had no idea what size or type I needed. And because I live oh 500 miles from my reception location, I can't just pop over and check it out and measure the space between the columns or stare at the trees and figure out whether I want lanterns to hang from the trees and, if so, how many. Do I want simple ("no frills") ones or fancier ones? What's the difference? Do I want plain white or a mix of white and green? Or white, green, and blue? Seriously!? Is it really this hard to pick out lanterns? One more thing not checked off the list. (But, hey, at least I know where I'm ordering them from--that's progress, right?)

P.S. Are you using paper lanterns? What size? What type? Does it matter?

Bridal Shower

from here

So, my sisters (my two Maids of Honor) are getting together this weekend and are planning my bridal shower. My sister sent me this question: what do you envision your shower to be like? Her suggestions were a quiant tea party, a spa gathering, a party at a chinese restaurant, a lingerie shower, a wine tasting. My answer: I have no frickin idea. What did you do for a shower? Or how was a shower that you attended and liked done?

Also, how did you handle inviting your fiance's family? Did you do a couple's shower? Did you have two showers? One for ladies and one with more family?

P.S. I know this picture has NOTHING to do with a bridal shower, but it is a bride (and her maids) ready for a (rain) shower, so I found it appropriate.

Bridesmaid Dress?

Available at Anthropologie

For $310, this Unique Recycled Vintage Wedding Dress could be yours!

Lulu Dress by Hay-Lo Designs

I think this dress is fantastic and would have purchased it and been done with my wedding dress shopping, except -- it's an empire-waist which doesn't do much for my hourglass figure and I am not sure I want to go the strapless route. But, I think that it is beautiful and the flowing skirt is "both romantic and fun." This dress fits like an 8 (36-29-full). Hay-lo is offering 60% off until April 30th, so go check it out!